Let me just get this out of the way first:
I love WalMart.
I do. It's my "go to" store for just about everything from bottled water to telephones; mascara to rain ponchos; laundry detergent to TV's. It can be akin to a kind of therapy for me sometimes. Lots and lots of aisles to get lost in, various goods and sundries to contemplate. And we all know we'd be hard pressed to beat their prices.
The only issues I have with WalMart is..... the other people that shop there. And maybe? Most of the employees.
Never, ever once have I been in WalMart where I haven't encountered the following:
- some one still sporting a mullet
- a dirty, screaming child
- adults with missing teeth
- some one paying with a just-cashed settlement/Welfare/unemployment check
- the morbidly obese
- the fatally stupid
- various assortments of what can only be described as mouth breathers and window lickers
And I've been in lots of WalMart's and Super WalMart's here in MD, PA, and FL - trust me, it's all the same.
Now, of course I realize that we're all God's creatures and yadda yadda yadda, but ok really? Look in a mirror, people. Discipline (and bathe) your kid(s). Visit a salon. Put down the chili cheese dog. Read a book. These are not hard tasks, nor foreign concepts. I manage to do them, as do all the people in my life. And we're not a bunch of rocket scientists or brain surgeons.
Look, all I'm sayin' is that when there is a website dedicated to the weirdness that WalMart attracts, clearly I'm not the only one who is noticing:
http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/
You don't see this shit at Target. I'm just sayin'.
Here's what I'd like to see - "T" shopping hours at WalMart. No one else, just me. And one employee working the floor, who I will hand pick. And one cashier, who I will also hand pick. That would be heaven on earth for me. And if I can't have that, I'd like to see some dental plans put to work, some pants pulled up to their proper location (i.e. above the ass crack, and/or Lady Business), and people not blocking the snack/chip aisle who really shouldn't be in that aisle to begin with. Because I'm telling you, the next kid I see acting like a poo flinging monkey up in my WalMart, will be sorry.
Film at 11:00.
Monday, November 30, 2009
Friday, November 27, 2009
Giving Thanks
Yesterday was Thanksgiving, which also signals the beginning of the holiday season. And while I've always loved them all and enjoy them, each year of my adult life there is a moment where I feel some sadness.
Merriam-Webster defines "family" as such:
1 : a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head : household
2 a : a group of persons of common ancestry : clan b : a people or group of peoples regarded as deriving from a common stock : race
3 a : a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation : fellowship b : the staff of a high official (as the President)
4 : a group of things related by common characteristics:
I'm one of these unusual people who don't have any family, other than my daughter, as defined by definition 2. And that's quite literally true. I don't have parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, or cousins. Nor do I have in-laws (which, ok really, maybe I shouldn't complain about).
But after a particularly tumultuous 2009 for me and my closest peeps, where lines in the sand were drawn, and some left us for paradise too soon, yesterday I was shown that family is more than just having genes in common. For me, it's more akin to definition 2b, 3, and 4. You see, all day long I was reminded from all directions that I'm thought of, loved, and cared for by people that don't have my hazel eyes or weirdly small feet.
In the morning, I was txted by my 3 closest girlfriends who told me that they love me and are thankful that I'm in their life (I also heard from quite a few others, just reaching out to say Happy Thanksgiving). That afternoon, my daughter and I were included (along with some of my best friends) in a delicious and damn good time of a Thanksgiving dinner by some new friends I'd only met 3 times before. High school and childhood friends, both local and far away, posted love and warm wishes to my Facebook page. I was woken up in the middle of the night by a txt message from another good friend, excited to share with me that his favorite college football team won (again, lol).
And while I do continue to miss my mom and sometimes wish for a room full of cousins, there are other ways to define and create your tribe. Take it from me - It's not blood lines or legal documents that make a family. It's love. Plain and simple. And I have an abundance of it.
Merriam-Webster defines "family" as such:
1 : a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head : household
2 a : a group of persons of common ancestry : clan b : a people or group of peoples regarded as deriving from a common stock : race
3 a : a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation : fellowship b : the staff of a high official (as the President)
4 : a group of things related by common characteristics:
I'm one of these unusual people who don't have any family, other than my daughter, as defined by definition 2. And that's quite literally true. I don't have parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, or cousins. Nor do I have in-laws (which, ok really, maybe I shouldn't complain about).
But after a particularly tumultuous 2009 for me and my closest peeps, where lines in the sand were drawn, and some left us for paradise too soon, yesterday I was shown that family is more than just having genes in common. For me, it's more akin to definition 2b, 3, and 4. You see, all day long I was reminded from all directions that I'm thought of, loved, and cared for by people that don't have my hazel eyes or weirdly small feet.
In the morning, I was txted by my 3 closest girlfriends who told me that they love me and are thankful that I'm in their life (I also heard from quite a few others, just reaching out to say Happy Thanksgiving). That afternoon, my daughter and I were included (along with some of my best friends) in a delicious and damn good time of a Thanksgiving dinner by some new friends I'd only met 3 times before. High school and childhood friends, both local and far away, posted love and warm wishes to my Facebook page. I was woken up in the middle of the night by a txt message from another good friend, excited to share with me that his favorite college football team won (again, lol).
And while I do continue to miss my mom and sometimes wish for a room full of cousins, there are other ways to define and create your tribe. Take it from me - It's not blood lines or legal documents that make a family. It's love. Plain and simple. And I have an abundance of it.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Oh No She DIDN'T
My kid has a step-grandma in Pennsylvania, whom she visited this past weekend. Step-grandma sent my kid home with all kinds of junk food, homemade baked goods, etc. Nice lady, she is.
Or so I thought. Until I saw this:
Sure, like me, at first you're probably thinking "Oo yum - Lays chips", but look at what's defacing the front of this bag:
The damn Steelers logo!
And ok really, is the little peppy "Go Steelers Go!" crap really necessary? Well, maybe in fairness, that's all Steelers fans can spell.
What fresh hell is this that the logo of the most vile team in the AFC has not only made it into this good and loving Ravens home, but has marred the packaging of a beloved snack food!?!?! Christ on a bike, I almost broke out into a rash. I almost didn't eat any. (almost)
Or so I thought. Until I saw this:
Sure, like me, at first you're probably thinking "Oo yum - Lays chips", but look at what's defacing the front of this bag:
The damn Steelers logo!
And ok really, is the little peppy "Go Steelers Go!" crap really necessary? Well, maybe in fairness, that's all Steelers fans can spell.
What fresh hell is this that the logo of the most vile team in the AFC has not only made it into this good and loving Ravens home, but has marred the packaging of a beloved snack food!?!?! Christ on a bike, I almost broke out into a rash. I almost didn't eat any. (almost)
The Big Company Rip Off, Part 3
After much internal debate, speaking to friends, and speaking to my financial management group, it has been decided that the whole amount Evil Company A is bullying me to pay them will be pulled from one of my portfolio thingies, deposited into my bank account, then my bank will issue a cashiers check to Evil Company A.
Which I will drop off. In person. Just so I can tell them to fuck off.
I will then turn over the $3K from Lovely Company B to said portfolio thingie. Which will help ease my loss. Emotionally, anyway.
During all this drama, two good pals suggested that I hire a lawyer and fight it. This does make sense, and I did seriously consider it. However, having gone down the lawyer road before, I felt that it would cost me more money (and aggravation) to wage a legal battle than the whole dollar amount in question. And much like divorcing a toxic spouse, I just want to cut ties with Evil Company A and get on with my life with my new boyfriend - Lovely Company B.
But...... what I WILL do is, once my last pay check from them is deposited, reveal the company name. Here, there, and everywhere I can.
MUHAHAHAHAHA!
Which I will drop off. In person. Just so I can tell them to fuck off.
I will then turn over the $3K from Lovely Company B to said portfolio thingie. Which will help ease my loss. Emotionally, anyway.
During all this drama, two good pals suggested that I hire a lawyer and fight it. This does make sense, and I did seriously consider it. However, having gone down the lawyer road before, I felt that it would cost me more money (and aggravation) to wage a legal battle than the whole dollar amount in question. And much like divorcing a toxic spouse, I just want to cut ties with Evil Company A and get on with my life with my new boyfriend - Lovely Company B.
But...... what I WILL do is, once my last pay check from them is deposited, reveal the company name. Here, there, and everywhere I can.
MUHAHAHAHAHA!
Monday, November 23, 2009
The Big Company Rip Off, Part2
AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
First, let me recap..... As you all know, since I'm resigning from Evil Company A less than one year after I took two Red Hat Linux classes, they want me to pay them back for the classes AND the 2 weeks of time I was told to charge to a Training & Education code. They have paperwork signed by me indicating I agreed to the former, but nothing to the latter. Lovely Company B, for whom I'll be working for on November 30th, will be picking up the tab for the cost of the classes.
I went to Evil Company A this afternoon for my out-briefing. Basically they wanted to know why I'm leaving (because you suck), and how they could improve (try not to suck). Last item on the agenda was the pile of money I'm told I owe. Whose combined total is over $6K. Just so you know.
I told the perfectly nice HR girl that Lovely Company B will be covering the cost of the courses I took ($3K), but that no one at Evil Company A could seem to find any signed paperwork where I agreed to pay back the time I charged to the Training & Education code should I resign in less than a year. She seemed to ignore this important paperwork fact, and explained that this is due upon the last day of employment. To which I countered that if I had $6K+ lying around this probably wouldn't be an issue, but I don't, so it is. I also added that if I'm going to be forced to pay this money, some sort of option for payments will have to be worked out.
Poor girl, she's new. This all seemed to get her panties in a wedge. She went looking for my Program Manager.
She was gone a while.
She came back alone, having spoken with the Training and Education Coordinator (the chick I've been arguing with in email; notice that she's in the building but won't come meet with me). She has been sent back with this lovely tid bit of information:
Signed paperwork or not, if the money isn't repaid by the time checks are mailed/direct deposited next Thursday, Evil Company A is going to hold my last paycheck.
THEY'RE GOING TO HOLD MY PAYCHECK!!!???
WTF?!?!?!
Ok really, if I don't have $6K to give them, what makes them think I can spare a whole fucking paycheck?!?!?
I start to flip out a little bit, tell nice HR girl that this is unacceptable, and off she goes again in search of some one, anyone.
She returns again after another longer than usual while, this time with another representative from Training and Education. This one tells me that they have to use leverage such as holding the last paycheck because they've been burned in the past by ex-employees agreeing to repay what they owe in payments, then they don't.
Aw, poor Evil Company A. Sorry, I don't give a fuck.
She also that if the money isn't repaid, they will file a 1099 tax form making me responsible for the taxes on the total amount.
I think that's supposed to scare me, and maybe it should because I'm a math 'tard, but really, how much could that be?
Oh, and they want Lovely Company B to pay them the $3K directly. Seriously, where the hell is the trust?? Lovely Company B has already told me it'll be a part of my second paycheck, which I relay to this T&E rep. Nope, not good enough, because (as stated above), they've been burned by others in the past.
Sounds like they need counseling, and maybe a spa weekend, not my cash.
I leave, agreeing to nothing but to be in touch.
After having a few hours to think (and simmer down), I'm going to place a call/email to my financial management group. Seems to me it would cost me less to let them keep my last paycheck, then in turn take the amount of that last paycheck out of one of my portfolio thingies AND pay the taxes on the $6K+, than it would be to pull the whole $6K+ out of my portfolio thingies and give it to this fucking piece of shit company.
Once again, stay tuned......
First, let me recap..... As you all know, since I'm resigning from Evil Company A less than one year after I took two Red Hat Linux classes, they want me to pay them back for the classes AND the 2 weeks of time I was told to charge to a Training & Education code. They have paperwork signed by me indicating I agreed to the former, but nothing to the latter. Lovely Company B, for whom I'll be working for on November 30th, will be picking up the tab for the cost of the classes.
I went to Evil Company A this afternoon for my out-briefing. Basically they wanted to know why I'm leaving (because you suck), and how they could improve (try not to suck). Last item on the agenda was the pile of money I'm told I owe. Whose combined total is over $6K. Just so you know.
I told the perfectly nice HR girl that Lovely Company B will be covering the cost of the courses I took ($3K), but that no one at Evil Company A could seem to find any signed paperwork where I agreed to pay back the time I charged to the Training & Education code should I resign in less than a year. She seemed to ignore this important paperwork fact, and explained that this is due upon the last day of employment. To which I countered that if I had $6K+ lying around this probably wouldn't be an issue, but I don't, so it is. I also added that if I'm going to be forced to pay this money, some sort of option for payments will have to be worked out.
Poor girl, she's new. This all seemed to get her panties in a wedge. She went looking for my Program Manager.
She was gone a while.
She came back alone, having spoken with the Training and Education Coordinator (the chick I've been arguing with in email; notice that she's in the building but won't come meet with me). She has been sent back with this lovely tid bit of information:
Signed paperwork or not, if the money isn't repaid by the time checks are mailed/direct deposited next Thursday, Evil Company A is going to hold my last paycheck.
THEY'RE GOING TO HOLD MY PAYCHECK!!!???
WTF?!?!?!
Ok really, if I don't have $6K to give them, what makes them think I can spare a whole fucking paycheck?!?!?
I start to flip out a little bit, tell nice HR girl that this is unacceptable, and off she goes again in search of some one, anyone.
She returns again after another longer than usual while, this time with another representative from Training and Education. This one tells me that they have to use leverage such as holding the last paycheck because they've been burned in the past by ex-employees agreeing to repay what they owe in payments, then they don't.
Aw, poor Evil Company A. Sorry, I don't give a fuck.
She also that if the money isn't repaid, they will file a 1099 tax form making me responsible for the taxes on the total amount.
I think that's supposed to scare me, and maybe it should because I'm a math 'tard, but really, how much could that be?
Oh, and they want Lovely Company B to pay them the $3K directly. Seriously, where the hell is the trust?? Lovely Company B has already told me it'll be a part of my second paycheck, which I relay to this T&E rep. Nope, not good enough, because (as stated above), they've been burned by others in the past.
Sounds like they need counseling, and maybe a spa weekend, not my cash.
I leave, agreeing to nothing but to be in touch.
After having a few hours to think (and simmer down), I'm going to place a call/email to my financial management group. Seems to me it would cost me less to let them keep my last paycheck, then in turn take the amount of that last paycheck out of one of my portfolio thingies AND pay the taxes on the $6K+, than it would be to pull the whole $6K+ out of my portfolio thingies and give it to this fucking piece of shit company.
Once again, stay tuned......
Saturday, November 21, 2009
I KNEW It!!
I have been living with a mental patient.
Which, really, I knew already, but it's nice to be validated. By science, no less.
You see, I recently heard that it seems that not only do our brains "grow" again in adolescence, but they're not even fully developed until we're around 25.
This? Explains a lot. My fellow parents of teenagers and young adults out there are nodding knowingly right about now. Ah, we are one, my friends. I feel your pain.
This? Might be a good argument for me not paying for college. I mean because, ok really - Why would I pay loads of money for a crazy person to be educated? Seems counter intuitive to me. I'm just sayin'.
As I think on all of this, it seems to me that logic would dictate that all this new/bigger gray matter would be ripe for all kids of good and useful things, but I personally think they stuff with useless crap, much like the stacks of clothes, shoes, and accessories in the corners and floors of their bedrooms (which I like to call Look At All The Piles Of Mommy's Money).
But it does make sense to me now why they do things like:
- Refuse to wear coats/jackets when it's cold, but will walk right out the door in 95 degree weather with a black hoodie on.
- The sudden deafness they experience as you speak, standing right in front of them, but they can hear their cell phone vibrate 2 floors away.
- Resist putting anything they own back in the same place consistently, then have a frickin' fit when they can't find it (refer to Look At All The Piles Of Mommy's Money above).
My teenager was once a lovey, huggy, kissy, wanted-to-be-with-me-all-the-time little girl, but around 12 it all started to change. I see glimpses of that kid from time to time, like when I get an out of the blue "Hi Mommy!", when she coos when I scratch her back, or when she allows me to kiss her, lol. She's still in there.
So I say to you, parents of little ones - be greedy with all their unabashed displays of physical affection, and imprint on your brains how their face lights up when they see you. Because there will come a time when it will change, and in their place will be a surly teen, walking out the door in August in a black hoodie.
But I'm hopeful because it sounds like this mental illness is only temporary. Long, aggravating, exhausting, but temporary. In the meantime, this Mommy has plenty of pictures and memories of that little girl to look back on. And wine. Lots of wine. ;-)
Which, really, I knew already, but it's nice to be validated. By science, no less.
You see, I recently heard that it seems that not only do our brains "grow" again in adolescence, but they're not even fully developed until we're around 25.
This? Explains a lot. My fellow parents of teenagers and young adults out there are nodding knowingly right about now. Ah, we are one, my friends. I feel your pain.
This? Might be a good argument for me not paying for college. I mean because, ok really - Why would I pay loads of money for a crazy person to be educated? Seems counter intuitive to me. I'm just sayin'.
As I think on all of this, it seems to me that logic would dictate that all this new/bigger gray matter would be ripe for all kids of good and useful things, but I personally think they stuff with useless crap, much like the stacks of clothes, shoes, and accessories in the corners and floors of their bedrooms (which I like to call Look At All The Piles Of Mommy's Money).
But it does make sense to me now why they do things like:
- Refuse to wear coats/jackets when it's cold, but will walk right out the door in 95 degree weather with a black hoodie on.
- The sudden deafness they experience as you speak, standing right in front of them, but they can hear their cell phone vibrate 2 floors away.
- Resist putting anything they own back in the same place consistently, then have a frickin' fit when they can't find it (refer to Look At All The Piles Of Mommy's Money above).
My teenager was once a lovey, huggy, kissy, wanted-to-be-with-me-all-the-time little girl, but around 12 it all started to change. I see glimpses of that kid from time to time, like when I get an out of the blue "Hi Mommy!", when she coos when I scratch her back, or when she allows me to kiss her, lol. She's still in there.
So I say to you, parents of little ones - be greedy with all their unabashed displays of physical affection, and imprint on your brains how their face lights up when they see you. Because there will come a time when it will change, and in their place will be a surly teen, walking out the door in August in a black hoodie.
But I'm hopeful because it sounds like this mental illness is only temporary. Long, aggravating, exhausting, but temporary. In the meantime, this Mommy has plenty of pictures and memories of that little girl to look back on. And wine. Lots of wine. ;-)
Thursday, November 19, 2009
The Big Company Rip Off
Working for The Man blows sometimes... and sometimes working for The Man's contractors really blows, especially when they try to rip you off as you're trying to move on to better opportunites. What do I mean? Well, let me tell you....
I've given Company A my two weeks notice, last day is next Wednesday. They don't hesitate to remind me that I will owe them $3k upon my resignation for two training courses I took in January. See, I (probably stupidly) signed an agreement that states that I will pay them back the cost of the courses if I quit within one year. Fine, no problem - Company B already knows this and will be covering the costs (yes, I heart Company B).
But lo! Today evil Company A tells me that I will also owe them for the time. That's right, I will owe them my 2 weeks of pay that they paid me, via an existing valid charge code. Ooooohhhhh bullshit! Bullshit, I say! So I began investigating this with evil Company A's training coordinator..... and? Turns out, they don't have a record of me signing those forms. And I sure reminded them that I do have a record of my manager approving my timesheet, under that charge code, for those two weeks!
Ok, really.... seems to me that if there's no form signed by me agreeing to this, and my manager long ago approved my timesheet for those two weeks, I'm not obligated to pay Company A that moola.
This saga will continue.....
I've given Company A my two weeks notice, last day is next Wednesday. They don't hesitate to remind me that I will owe them $3k upon my resignation for two training courses I took in January. See, I (probably stupidly) signed an agreement that states that I will pay them back the cost of the courses if I quit within one year. Fine, no problem - Company B already knows this and will be covering the costs (yes, I heart Company B).
But lo! Today evil Company A tells me that I will also owe them for the time. That's right, I will owe them my 2 weeks of pay that they paid me, via an existing valid charge code. Ooooohhhhh bullshit! Bullshit, I say! So I began investigating this with evil Company A's training coordinator..... and? Turns out, they don't have a record of me signing those forms. And I sure reminded them that I do have a record of my manager approving my timesheet, under that charge code, for those two weeks!
Ok, really.... seems to me that if there's no form signed by me agreeing to this, and my manager long ago approved my timesheet for those two weeks, I'm not obligated to pay Company A that moola.
This saga will continue.....
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